THE PERFECT FITTING CONDOM

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I did my blog talk radio show last night. Tuesday Talk with Key West Lou. One of the topics was concerned with wasteful government spending. Condoms the issue.

We live in a time when the House of Representatives has voted to cut back food stamps $40 billion over ten years, $9 billion already cut this year for failure to renew a different  food stamp  program. Congress continues to fail reauthorizing the $300 per week to the long time unemployed. During the last government shut down, the milk for babies program and school lunches came to a halt. Republicans clamor to cut Social Security, Medicare and Medicaid.

The federal budget is gigantic. A lot of room in its pages for small stupid things to be buried. Wasteful items. The perfect fitting condom is one of them.

Congress authorized the National Institute of Health to award a $224,000 grant to a Georgia based condom company. The purpose of the grant was to create the perfect fitting condom. Stated another way, condoms for every size and shape. The goal of the study was to come up with 95 different sized condoms. The number 95 is amusing. From shirts to pants to dresses to blouses to skirts to shoes, none has 95 different sizes. Not even close.

Part of the study included coming up with a method by which the penis could be measured. We don’t want anyone purchasing the wrong size!

For those who may be unaware, condoms presently come in two or three sizes. Regular and maxi. I am not sure if small.

Congress stated there was a legitimacy to the study. Apparently condoms are not being used enough by men. The reason alleged is that they are uncomfortable. If properly sized, the problem would disappear. A medical reason was involved, also. The greater use of condoms would result in a  reduction of STDs.

We actually pay our Congressmen to come up with such goodies! We really do!

I suspect the real reason might be that a political favor was owed to the Georgia company which resulted in the grant. Or maybe the study is a legitimate scientific one. You decide.

The weather. Getting cold. Sixty nine degrees at the present time.

It will be 62 during the night. Through sunday, the temperature will be in the 60s by day and 50s by night.

Cold!!!!!

I know. I should not complain. Better than the  -20 they are experiencing up north.

Enjoy your day!

I FORGOT

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Show time! My blog talk radio show tonight at 9. Tuesday Talk with Key West Lou. Join me for a quick half hour of eye opening revealing topics. www.blogtalkradio.com/key-west-lou.

This evening I will be discussing the Japanese purchase of Jim Beam, $224,000 Congress authorized for a federal study re making custom fit condoms, Congressional wealth, Nixon’s electronic surveillance of private citizens, the French taxing CEO’s who make in excess of 1 million euros 75 per cent, and more.

Heat up some pop corn, sit back and enjoy!

Sloan and I spent a hard two hours working yesterday afternoon. It was her teaching me how to use the computer more efficiently.

Went to Don’s Place first last night. I was looking for Keith and Jimmy. They are always there. Except the one night I needed to talk with them. Instead, I enjoyed a brief chat with Frankie the Plumber. One of the best.

Then to the Chart Room. Chatted with Mary, Peter, and Che. Mostly with Che.

Che hit me with…..I see your face all over town! He was referring to my cover picture on KONK Life which in effect was advertising my book The World Upside Down. Che wanted to read the book. Buy it, I told him. Amazon.com and Barnesandnoble.com. Turns out as smart and well read as Che is, he cannot operate a computer. Che is 80, which should mean nothing. I am 78 and do.

One way or another, Che will come up with the book.

I got into David Wolkowsky who I blogged about yesterday. I was curious if the present Chart Room is the original built by Wolkowsky. I thought Che might now. He has lived in Key West more than 40 years. Not long enough to know, as it turned out. No one seemed to know. Che and the Chart Room go hand in hand. Che is one of the last two persons living who when dead will have their ashes placed in the bar rail.

Che and I covered Italy, Greece, and London. Che is seriously considering leaving Key West after all his years here. That is how we got into European locations.

I stopped at Tavern ‘n Town on the way home for a bite to eat. A small pizza. I sat at the bar and was enjoying the Duke/Virginia game. All of a sudden, information regarding the Syracuse/Boston College game flashed across the bottom of the screen. I had forgotten about the game! I thought it was wednesday night! When I got home, I learned Syracuse had won by 10 points. Syracuse was behind several points with 10 minutes to go in the game and went on a 15-0 run. Pittsburgh saturday. I will not forget. It will be as big as the Villanova game. Pittsburgh has only lost one game this season.

The bartender looked familiar. He said I looked familiar to him. Once I told him my name, he remembered. He used to work for Great Events back when. Great Events used to do my big parties. One hundred fifty to two hundred people. His name is Andrew. We had an interesting time recollecting the parties and the fine work Great Events did.

I may have missed the Syracuse game. I finished the evening on a high note, however. I watched a 1936 movie with two great stars. Eddie Cantor and Ethel Merman. Strike Me Pink was the name of the movie. A funny musical with a happy ending.

A final reminder. Watch my show tonight. I guarantee you will find it interesting.

Enjoy your day!

DAVID WOLKOWSKY

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Jimmy Buffett was in Key West friday night. He attended David Wolkowsky’s annual cocktail party which has become a part of the Key West Literary Seminary. The Seminary is on going this week. The party was held on the roof top of the Kress building. Better known to most as the building which housed Fast Buck Freddy’s for years.

There was a picture in yesterday’s Key West Citizen of Buffett and Wolkowsky at the party. Buffett and Wolkowsky are business partners. Buffett also proudly tells all that Wolkowsky was the first person to hire him.

The old timers in Key West know of Wolkowsky. Some of the newer residents perhaps not. Most of the tourists not.

I want to share with you David Wolkowsky’s story.

Wolkowsky is 94 years old. He is a legend in his own time. A quiet unassuming millionaire. He is responsible for much of what is Key West today. He worked diligently to preserve the best of old Key West. He was primarily responsible in the prevention of high rise buildings on the island.

He is known as the American Developer. Not for his efforts in Key West alone, but also for the significant preservation work he did in his younger days in Philadelphia.

His grandfather came to Key West in the late 1880s and opened a fine clothing store on Duval Street. Wolkowsky was born in Key West. The family at some point moved to Miami. Wolkowsky later went to college at the University of Pennsylvania. After graduation, he settled in Philadelphia. He was best known in those years for the renovation and preservation of what once had been Philadelphia’s best neighborhoods.

He was financially successful. In 1962 at the age of 40, he retired to Key West. Soon after, he started developing Key West real estate.

Today’s Captain Tony’s stands because of Wolkowsky’s efforts. This goes back to when it was Sloppy Joe’s and Hemingway’s first hang out. The building had been condemned. Wolkowsky saved it.

In 1967, he built a 50 room motel and restaurant at what would be 0 Duval today. It was called the Pier House Resort Motel. The forerunner of today’s Pier House.

My favorite haunt the Chart Room was a part of Wolkowsky’s Pier House. Here is where Jimmy Buffett comes into the picture. Wolkowsky was the first to hire him and it was at the Chart Room.

Wolkowsky built a dream home some eight miles off Key West on Ballast Key. He entertained often at both the Pier House and Ballast Key. He entertained the likes of Truman Capote, Tennesee Williams, Leonard Bernstein, Rudolf Nureyev, and Lillian Hellman. The Rockefellers,  Mellons and Vanderbilts were his guests, as well as British Prime Minister Edward Heath.

Wolkowsky entertained at Ballast Key with a menu consisting of hot dogs, white wine and potato chips. For which he was famous.

Another significant accomplishment was his construction of the Reach Resort.

Wolkowsky  could be seen over the years driving around Key West in a golf cart or his beloved 1926 Rolls Royce.

A man for the ages. Key West is fortunate that he settled here and his family before him. Conchs all in every sense of the word!

Enjoy your day!

 

QUIRKY SATURDAY

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Saturday is normally out on the town for me in the evening. Not yesterday.

My whole away from home experience yesterday was watching the Syracuse/North Carolina game at John Lukas’ Big Ten Sports Pub from noon to 2.. I went home intending to attend to a few matters and head out again around 5. Never made it. I started researching what will be this week’s KONK Life column. By the time I finished, it was after 7. I did not feel like going anywhere.

The column will involve a recent federal court decision declaring Florida’s law requiring welfare applicants to get a drug test unconstitutional. Pee in the cup is no longer or until and if a higher court decides otherwise. The article also includes Governor Scott’s involvement and support for the law. He pushed drug testing for welfare recipients. You will find his interaction most interesting.

Syracuse, my Syracuse! Wow! Beat North Carolina yesterday 57-45. It was Syracuse all the way. North Carolina was never in the game, except for the first few minutes. Syracuse did a typical game start. North Carolina was up 8-2 before the ‘Cuse got rolling.

32,000 watched the game at the Carrier dome. For 20 years, I watched every home game at the Carrier Dome. Exciting years with each game an exciting experience.

Jim Vitale announced. Syracuse fans all were thrilled with his presence. Said with tongue in cheek. I have never heard Vitale say anything good about Syracuse or Boeheim. Some place way back, he and Boeheim must have had a run in.

It was different yesterday. Vitale could not say enough good things about Syracuse and Boeheim. He ventured that Syracuse was a championship game team. He also thought Boeheim was Coach of the Year thus far. He could not say enough nice things about Syracuse.

Skaneateles Dan and I watched the game together.

There is an interesting person in Key West today. His name is Kenneth Morris, Jr. He is the great, great, great grandson of Frederick Douglas and also a descendant of Booker T. Washington. His presence is sponsored by The Little White House.

Morris has been described as a modern day abolitionist. Today’s human traffic is one of his concerns. It is the topic he will be addressing.

Enjoy your Sunday!

THIRTY THREE YEARS AGO

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Thirty three years ago this week  I was in Portland, Maine. First and last time. Said I would never return and I have not.

Bob and Helen got married. I was their best man. The ceremony took place in a small Lutheran Church. The same Church Helen’s parents had been married in during World War II. Nostalgia was in the air. Helen wore the same suit and hat her mother had worn. She was lovely!

The ceremony was by candlelight. Not because of the mood it created. Rather because there was an electricity problem which you will understand better as this tale unwinds.

Afterwards, we celebrated with dinner at what was purported to be the oldest restaurant in Portland. I believed it. The structure was just clapboard. Nothing else. No more wood, no plaster board, no insulation.

I froze my ass off! The whole time in Portland. The restaurant being the worst. It was twenty below zero!

I had driven to Portland with a friend. Bob Mazza. I had a cold before I even started the trip. It got much worse in the -20 degree weather. By the time I hit the restaurant, I thought I was going to die.

Heat. forget it. There was no heat anywhere. It was 1981. Carter was President. We were experiencing our first big fuel crisis. An example of how bad it was was when I went to a mammoth shopping center to buy something to help cure my cold. The place was like a refrigerator. No, a deep freeze. The store the employees all wearing winter coats and fur lined boots. The boots still stick in my mind.

The next day Bob and I headed south. He was to drop me off at the Boston airport. I had planned to go to a Club Med in Martinique. Bob thought I was too sick to go. I thought so too. I was feverish and felt like shit. All of a sudden I decided screw it! Take  me to the airport! The sun would kill whatever was bothering my body.

I went to Martinique. Two days on the beach in the sun and I was cured!

Bob and Helen. Happy anniversary! You are two of the loveliest people I know. I was honored  when Bob asked me to be best man. I continue to feel honored to this day. It is unfortunate we do not see more of each other. My fault more than yours.

Bob and Helen have retired to Las Vegas.

Last night was dinner at the Hogfish bar with Pati.

At noon today, the Syracuse/North Carolina basketball game. Syracuse is a 7 point favorite. I will be watching the game at the Sports Pub.

I know Bob will be watching the game. He is a die hard Syracuse fan as I am.

Enjoy your day!

EARTHQUAKE IN KEY WEST

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Sometimes things happen all at the same time. Then it is the mundane for days. Yesterday was big for happenings…..All new!

Lets start with the earthquake. Yes, Key West experienced an earthquake. At 3:57 yesterday afternoon. The quake actually occurred 10 miles off the north shore of Cuba. Well below the ocean floor. Its impact was felt in Key West. By some, not all. Key West experienced neither damage nor injury to life.

The earthquake was a 5.1. A significant number. We were immediately advised by television reports not to worry about a tsunami. Apparently a 6.0 or better is required.

I did not feel the earthquake. I did not know one had occurred till I reached the Chart Room and Emily told me. When the quake hit, I was in my car driving from the Plantation Coffee House to the Pier House. It seemed that anyone who was driving did not experience the earth’s movement.

However, those who were on the second and third floors of buildings did. Sheila was on the third floor of the Custom House and felt it. David was on the second floor where he works. He experienced it. Jean and Joe, Peter, and Emily did not.

The locals group were all at the Chart Room early comparing notes.

My compliments to Sean Kinney. He is a reporter for a local newspaper owned by the Miami Herald. He is also the Miami Herald’s man in Key West. Within minutes, Sean had reported the quake and it was being carried on the Miami Herald website.

A television star from a popular TV show was in town. Guy Fieri of the Food Channel’s Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives. Guy and crew had come in Wednesday. Did their work. Stayed overnight at the Pier House. Enjoyed the hospitality of the Chart Room later in the evening. Guy and most left yesterday morning. It appeared one of the show’s producers remained.

The show hit three Key West places of note. I know two. Bad Boy Burrito and Garbo’s. Famous they will be once the show airs. Tourists will seek them out for the next ten years. Look what a bit of notoriety did for Louie’s Back Yard.

The most important thing is that the show will be recognizing a Key West luminary. One who people have paid little attention to up to this time. The cook at Bad Boy Burrito. It is our own Grant. Grant of Don’s Place fame who I periodically mention. A good man!

The third noteworthy item was that this week’s KONK Life hit the streets yesterday. My picture on the cover. The whole page. Basically a reprint of the cover of my new book The World Upside Down. It thrilled me! My vanity is showing, I guess.  My thanks to publisher Guy de Boer.

Dan…..Where are you? I have stopped at Don’s outside bar four times looking for you. Have you given up drinking? Syracuse plays North Carolina tomorrow at noon. I will be at the Sports Pub. I hope to see you and Lisa again.

Enjoy your day!

HONEYMOON OVER…..TV / INTERNET SHOW NO MORE

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All good things come to an end. Fortunately and unfortunately. My Friday morning TV/internet show The Key West Lou Legal Hour will no longer be aired.

I started with KONK six years ago doing an internet show. Two years ago moved over to WEYW television which joined television and the internet together for me. The reception has been fantastic! People in many countries watched the show.

I will still be doing my blog talk radio show tuesday evenings, writing my once a week column for KONK Life, and writing my daily blog.

The television show was fun to do. Hard work, also. It took 10-12 hours a week to prepare for the show. Hard to believe. My plate was becoming full. Publishing my first book recently made me anxious to do another. I was working as hard as I did when I was practicing law. Something had to give.

The bottom line is there will be a new book out sooner than I thought. I am restructuring my day so as to work on it at least 3 hours a day.

This week’s KONK Life is on the stands today. You must read it. I am the cover. Me all alone. The cover page in effect announces my new book. I thank KONK’s owner Guy de Boer for providing the opportunity to further publicize The World Upside Down.

Terri White is back in the news! It was announced yesterday that Terri has received the New York Cabaret Award for 2013. The award is for The Best One-Show Special Event of 2013. It was for Terri’s performance at 54 Below, Broadway’s premier supper club. Good girl, Terri! Go!

Interestingly, Terri was blackballed on Broadway in the early 1980s when it was discovered she was gay. Now she receives awards. As the world turns.

I had a good time last night. Don and I went out together. To the Chart Room. Stayed a long time. Chatted with Emily, Peter, Sean, and Sheila. Don is good company to be out on the town with. I was the designated driver, of course.

Enjoy your day!

TUESDAY BLOG TALK RADIO

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At 9 last night, I did my blog talk radio show. Tuesday Talk with Key West Lou. From the kitchen table in my frosty home. A Key West home. Not supposed to be cold.

Yesterday and last night it was! As were all parts of the eastern seaboard. Normally, I do the show in shorts and a tee shirt. Last night long pants and a sweat shirt. Normally with the glass sliding doors open and a bit of heat pouring in. Last night with the doors shut. A closed door did not keep the cold out, however.

I enjoy doing the blog talk radio show. I started it just a year ago. In January. The following is terrific. It took hold almost immediately.

Three topics I thought were exceptionally interesting. One was the question as to whether the U.S. is an emerging police state what with NSA surveillance and police body searches. Another involved the Chrysler bailout. Chrysler is evidencing its gratitude to the American people for saving its ass. They plan to build plants in China. The final topic concerned North Korea’s Kim Jong Un. He had his uncle executed a couple of weeks ago. One hundred twenty wild dogs were unleashed upon him. How can we do business with such a mentality?

Syracuse, my Syracuse. Beat Virginia tech last night 72-52. Syracuse now 15-0.

I never got to Lukas’ place to watch the second half of the game after my show concluded. I went upstairs to change. I had turned the heat on earlier. The room felt so comfortable. I went to bed instead and watched a movie. No local TV of the game last night.

Walked a bit yesterday. Home Depot. Since it wa around 60 degrees, I was dressed accordingly. Long pants, a shirt and my leather jacket. I walked. It was uncomfortable. The jacket was too heavy and too warm as I got into a gait. Should have left the jacket in the car.

Then to the Plantation Coffee House to read the newspapers. Followed by home to finalize my notes for last night’s show.

The weather was cold yesterday. It was cold during the night. It is cold this morning. I gave in yesterday afternoon. Turned pn the heat on the second floor where my bedroom is located. My bedroom faces the northwest. When the cold wind comes in off the ocean, you can hang meat in the bedroom.

Enjoy your day!

OCEAN WEATHER

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Key West is a tiny island. Like 1.5 x 4.0 miles. Key West sits with the Atlantic Ocean on one side and the Gulf of Mexico on the other. Weather is wild and uncertain. Changes occur suddenly.

Two days ago, we had a healthy all day and part of the night rain storm. Flooding everywhere. Sun never shone.

This morning the island is at peace. Nothing moving. There is no breeze. The water flat and quiet. Sun shining. A few scattered white clouds. High today will be 80.

I find the weather changes exciting. Always a surprise.

Today is a big day in American history. On this day in 1939, Superman made his debut as a comic strip hero.

The college football game of the year tonight. The BCS Championship Game. Florida State and Auburn. The young men on both teams probably do not appreciate the life time impact the game’s result will have on them.. Those who play on the winning team will remember the night the rest of their lives. In all likelihood, it will be the biggest event in their lives. The experience hard to duplicate. These are lucky men who will be playing. Few of us have the opportunity to know such an experience.

I will watch the game at either Don’s Place or home. Depends how I feel.

Another easy Sunday yesterday. I was up early. Did my blog early. Watched the first half of the Cincinnati game with Don and David. Then to Publix. Out of food again. Sunday afternoon is not the best time to grocery shop. Publix was so packed there were only three carts available. Last night, early to bed and sleep.

I lead such an exciting life!

Tomorrow night at 9 my blog talk radio show. www.blogtalkradio.com/key-west-lou. A quick half hour of interesting developments. You can call in if you like.

I plan on dwelling on the huge increase in body cavity searches by the police, the Little Sisters of the Poor’s last minute application to the Supreme Court to get rid of a portion of the section of Obamacare dealing with birth control, the Attorney General continuing to not prosecute bank officials, the perfect example being JP Morgan Chase, how we got screwed again with a bailout, the story of Chrysler, Fiat, and automobile factories to be built in China, and more.

Interesting, revealing, and fun to listen to. Join me.

Enjoy your day!

 

THE RIORDANS ARE BACK IN TOWN

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The Riordans have returned!

Dan and Lisa Riordan hail from Skaneateles, New York. They own a restaurant there. The Blue Water Grill. Normally, they rent a house for one month. This year, two! Good for them! Eventually they will buy. The pattern is the same for all of us.

Two daughters and a boy friend are with them for a few days.

I will be blessed for the next two months with Dan and Lisa watching the Syracuse games with me. Voracious fans!

One of their daughters works for the U.S. Treasury in Syracuse. She works with Michael Timpano. A name I have not heard in years. Michael grew up with my son. The best of friends back then. I knew Michael’s parents well. My contemporaries. I hope they are alive and well. Timpano was and still is a well respected name in the Utica area.

Dan and Lisa arrived in Key West Friday. They had to stock up on groceries. Went to Publix. They were shocked at the cost of food in Key West. Much higher than in upstate New York. The high price of groceries in Key West is an item of frequent discussion  amongst those who live here. A rip off!

I watched the Syracuse/Miami game with the Riordans and guest yesterday. A heart wrenching game. Nothing but pain.

Syracuse won 49-44. A football score. An ugly game. We were 20 point favorites going in. I hope this is not that type season.

What irritates me is that whenever I become a believer that this year’s Syracuse team is a great one, something screws up. Villanova made me a believer this year. Miami now makes me question my judgment. We shall see.

It was hard to believe yesterday’s weather. Rain! Rain! And then more rain! It never stopped. The type of rain that accompanies a hurricane or tropical storm. Monsoon type. Blew sideways on occasion.

I drove home from the Sports Pub immediately after the game at 4. I was fearful of flooding roads that might prevent me from making it. The streets were horrible! Water everywhere! The boulevard was especially dangerous. Because of the construction, the highway was flooded more than normal. You had to drive slow. I was concerned my car would flood.

It took me 35 minutes to get home. Normally, a 15 minute trip.

I heard from a friend in Greece this morning. Come buy an apartment he told me. Condominiums in central Athens that previously sold for several hundred euros a piece are now on the market for 14,000 euros. About $21,000 American money. A steal!

I continue to believe violence will occur in Greece. The unemployed figure continues to rise. Supermarkets are closing because people do not have the money to buy food. A bad situation.

What a difference as day makes! It is Sunday. The sun is shining. There is nary a cloud in the sky. Anticipated high today 80 degrees. However, rain is projected for this afternoon and evening.

Enjoy your day!