FOUR HORSEMEN OF APOCALYPSE

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Too many mornings we wake with new Trump tweets. Some extremely dangerous. Especially those where he threatens another nation with war.

This morning finds Trump in a Tweet pissing match with Iran. Not sure who stated this one. Iran says if the U.S. missteps, it will be me met with the “mother of all wars.”

Trump’s promises “…..dire consequences…..the likes of which few throughout history have ever suffered before. He responds, “We are no longer a country that will stand for your demented words of violence and death. Be cautious.”

Words of war.

Trump reminds me of the Four Horsemen of Apocalypse: Conquest, War, Famine, and Death. I can see them all riding through the clouds. Who is leading them? Donald Trump. Not on the lead horse. On all four.

He finally will have proved to the world (and himself) what a tough guy he is.

Any such war will leave the U.S. in shambles. Such a war will be fought on our shores also. Every day a 9/11.

The U.S. will resemble Hiroshima and Nagasaki, and Berlin following World War II. Many dead. Children maimed.

Wake up America!

Enjoyed the British Open yesterday. Italy’s Francesco Molinari won. Seven or eight in the running the last 9 holes. Tiger Woods the leader at the turn, but faltered.

Good golf played on a tough course.

Visited the Orchid Key Inn bar for the first time last night. Victor invited me. He is the sunday bartender.

What a place? A hidden wonder. Off Duval near Truman. A magnificent setting! The bar charming. Tiny. Seats only 6.

Kevin and Holly were there. I suspected they would be.

A Bruce and Kevin sat next to me. Bruce retired. His career spent with Voice of America. Kevin with the Post Office.

We chatted about Post Office problems. How Congress screwed the Post Office.

Bruce recalled seeing me 10 years ago on Channel 19. I did a TV show for 3 years that ran from Key West to Fort Lauderdale. I was shocked he even watched. Channel 19 was what might be described as a small station. I was one of two live shows. The rest old gray and white TV shows like Leave It To Beaver.

Bruce mentioned the Orchid Key Inn was listed #2 on Trip Adviser under Best Key West Hotels. And I never knew it existed!

Met Peter. For a little bar, it had some interesting customers.

Peter is a musician and has entertained at Sloppy Joe’s for 30 years. From 5:30 to 9:30. Must catch his show one evening.

People came and went. I stayed. The bar was a gold mine of interesting people.

In came David and Louise. Visiting from London. David is with NATO and Louise a kindergarten teacher.

Great conversation. Issues involving Trump, NATO, Trump’s recent visit, etc. Both thought it awful that Trump kept the 92 year old Queen waiting 12 minutes. Standing in the sun waiting for Trump to arrive.

My night was not over yet.

Went over to Blue McCaw. A late bite to eat. Ribs and a drink.

Not ready for bed and home when I left Blue McCaw. Donna and Terri live across the street. Visited with them a while.

Dueling Bartenders tonight. Terri wanted to go. Donna working. Terri my date. I pick her up at 5:30. I expect Jean, Kevin, Holly and John will be there also.

To win the Hemingway Look-a-Like contest a big deal. The honor of honors to those interested. One hundred twenty five plus compete each year. For some reason, it takes roughly 10 years of participation to be seriously considered.

This year’s winner Michael Groover. Michael is husband to celebrity chef and TV star Paula Deen. Paula the loyal wife. She has been in Key West supporting her husband those 10 years of Hemingway Day visits.

BOB back. Rested and ready to go.

BOB’s topic today Fantasy Fest.

The Key West of 39 years ago was not the Key West of today. In addition to the summer being slow, the fall was dead. Key West merchants came up with a plan they thought would attract tourists to Key West during the slow fall season.

A fantasy fest. An adult party. Flavors of a Roman holiday. A bit of debauchery.

It worked. Key West’s famous Fantasy Fest was born. Ten days of partying each year.

Wilder as the years progressed. Nudity became an issue. Drinking, also.

Women began going bare chested. Men covering their genitalia with a small strip of cloth.

The partiers did not mind. Locals neither. They participated. Except for a few. The few were one or two ministers annually. They formed the Christian Coalition. The Christian Coalition was supported by very few. City fathers were thrilled. Key West was making a ton of money during those 10 days.

BOB said, “Morality and good taste were susupended…..an abyss filled.” BOB added the opposing ministers forgot to recognize that Key West churches were filled will sinners seeking forgiveness in the weeks following Fantasy Fest.

Women’s naked breasts were painted by kiosks on the streets. Many for real costumes were oversized genitalia. Alcohol was being consumed on the streets.

The Duval Crawl took on added meaning.  As BOB humorously said, “See the Lower Keys on your hands and knees. America is calling you today.”

Back in the early days, 50,000 would show up for the saturday night parade. No one knew where they all slept. When awake however, they “simply enjoyed the wicked and titillating surrender to their basic instincts.”

The squeaky wheel always gets oiled. The Christian Coalition was a squeaky wheel. Compromises were arrived at. All revealed in the next episode of BOB.

Enjoy your day!

 

-16 DEGREES

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Happy New Year!

To most of the country freezing their butts off, Happy New Year! Hang in there. Warm weather will return. It always does.

I received an early morning Happy New Year from a Utica friend. Minus sixteen degrees! I remember those days. Brutal!

Chilly in Key West last night. I am ashamed to say got down to 65 degrees. I turned the heat on. You would too if you lived here all year long. Your blood thins. You are more susceptible to cold.

Key West very cold around the corner. Temperatures in the 50’s. Tomorrow night, low 62. Then a few days with the high in the mid 60’s and night times in the mid 50’s.

Key West style cold!

I remained in last night. The highlight of my evening the Syracuse/Virginia Tech game. Syracuse won 68-56. Syracuse played terrific!

Virginia Tech came into the game with the top field goal percentage in the nation. 54.5 percent. Fourth re 3 shooting percentage. 43.7. Syracuse kept Virginia Tech well below those numbers.

Syracuse’s defense outstanding! Shooting  much better. The team was making shots. Still need improvement in the shooting area, however.

A tough ACC schedule ahead.

Go ‘Cuse!

I wanted to be awake at midnight to watch the ball fall. Missed it. Woke at 12:15. Watched some blabbing from New York. Found New Orleans at 1 my time for their Happy New Year. Provided me with the thrill of it all.

CNN ran Key West 15 minutes after Sushi came down in the shoe. She was walking around by the time they got to her. Never the less, still good. An attractive Sushi in a bright red dress. She makes all her clothes herself. The crowd huge and noisy.

Key West has more than one person descending something or other at midnight. The pirate wench at the Waterfront always a hit. She (a for real one) comes down from the top of a tall ship’s mast. Other descents include a conch shell, Keys lime wedge, unicorn and a tuna.

Something for everyone!

New Year’s Day was not always celebrated January 1. The early calendar was a mess. Unreliable. Followed the lunar cycle. Changed a bit every year. The bits turned into a large number at some point and adjustments had to be made.

Julius Caesar said enough! In 45 B.C., the Julian calendar took effect. Caesar took a little glory from the event. Quintilis was the original name of July. Caesar changed it to July, naming the month after himself.

In the 1570’s, the calendar was still screwed up. By the year 1,000, the calendar had added 7 days. By the mid 1500’s, 10 days.

Pope Gregory III solved the problem by adding 1 day to the calendar every 4 years. Leap year! Still works today.

The new calendar became known as the Gregorian calendar.

Key West’s Dachshund Walk yesterday a success. More than 200 dachshunds participated.

I receive my daily Key West Citizen via the internet. No January 1 edition this morning. Why? I hope it was not because the Citizen gave its workers a day off because of the holiday. A lot of Key Westers worked yesterday. The Citizen should have also, if such was the reason.

Enjoy your day!

CONCH REPUBLIC DAYS

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It was April 1982. Drugs and illegal immigrants were coming in through Key West and the lower Keys. The U.S. Border Patrol set up a roadblock and checkpoint at the northern end of US 1.

Traffic backed up big time. Many locals and tourists were inconvenienced and angry.

A federal court action was brought to have the roadblock/checkpoint removed. It failed.

Key Westers were undaunted. Their mentality prevailed. A group of local citizens decided to protest. In humorous fashion, of course. They went to the roadblock/checkpoint and opened one on their own. Under the auspices of the newly formed Conch Republic. The day, April 23.

History was made!

The men assembled advised the U.S. Border Patrol that Key West had seceded and was an independent nation. They further advised that then and there they were declaring war on the United States.

The group waited one minute and then advised they were surrendering. In addition, they demanded $1 billion in foreign aid.

The aid never came. However much has developed since that 1982 day.

The Conch Republic has won a form of recognition from the U.S. It has a capital headquarters in a yellow conch house on Simonton Street. The Conch Republic flag flies in front.

The Conch Republic has an Army, Navy and Air Force. Officers uniformed. An ocean going fleet consisting of the Schooner Wolf and ten civilian boats. An Air Force consisting of several pre-World War II bi-planes.

A female contingent exists. Young lovely ladies. Their uniform, bikinis.

Even a national anthem. Working In The Conch Republic.

The 35th anniversary of the birth of the Conch Republic is being celebrated with a week long event. Begins tonight at the Schooner Wharf Bar at 7. The event is the Conch Shell Blowing Contest.

A major event is the Great Sea Battle which will take place in a few days. The Conch Republic and United States engage in war!

Off Schooner Wharf, the Conch Republic Navy consisting of the schooner Wolf (a pirate ship in reality) and several small motorized vehicles will engage the big ships of the U.S. Coast Guard. The Conch’s will fire sea water via large hoses at the Coast Guard. The Coast Guard will retaliate with fire hoses.

The Conch’s will throw cabbages, eggs and tomatoes at the Coast Guard. The bikini clad ladies will be holding on from the yardarm doing most of the throwing. They will be attired as pirate ladies. The men as pirates, also.

The air battle is terrific. U.S. Navy jets from Boca Chica will engage Conch Republic bi-planes. The bi-planes will also bomb the Coast Guard cutters. With rolls of toilet paper which open up and flutter down on the Coast Guard vessels. Something to see.

Don’t miss the Great Sea Battle! It’s a winner!

Buffalo’s Tom and Fran Dixon are in town. I hope to go out to dinner with them tonight.

Enjoy your day!